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Do These Pants Make My Ass Look Gay?

Back in junior high school I cared about my looks. I had the Girbaud jeans, eyeliner and bleached, curly bangs just like Martin Gore. After getting my ass kicked 32,768 times by jocks calling me a fag, I decided that caring about how I looked just wasn't that important.

Since those days, I have been happy simply to not smell like a homeless person. Something has changed recently. A few months ago, I had my hair cut by a man. A vain, beautiful, talented, straight man. Yes, a man in a salon styled my hair as European house dance music thumped loud enough to silence my homophobia.

As he gently massaged the finishing rinse into my scalp, I thought, "Would people think I was gay if I blogged about how much I'm enjoying this?"

I stopped caring after he finished cutting and styling. And I will never care again. You see, I've been back to see my new man-crush a couple times now and let me tell you something.

I look fabulous.

Filed under -


Fabulous
Submitted by Simeon (not verified) on February 7, 2007 - 6:23pm.

You're not gay. Just a little queer. ha ha.

Submitted by Pete on February 8, 2007 - 9:26am.

I prefer peculiar.

**grin**
Submitted by Sideon on February 7, 2007 - 11:04pm.

"...a man in a salon styled my hair as European house dance music thumped loud enough to silence my homophobia."

Next assignment: getting a massage from a guy. I've received massages from women and (gasp!) even got an e-rec-tion - but I'm still as gay as those Girbaud jeans.

:)

Your posts crack me up.

Submitted by Pete on February 8, 2007 - 9:25am.

I get an erection just sitting in the lobby waiting for a massage.

What else can I say?
Submitted by danny on February 7, 2007 - 11:41pm.

Yes, enjoying anything virtuous lovely of good report or praiseworthy? Gay. Liking anything, Gay. Wondering if liking something makes you gay? Gay. Being a Police man, a big burly construction worker or a coach of anything...gay. Like music? that's gay. Member of a "Family"? Oh God, Gay. Can you see all the colors from Violet to red? Gay. Calling things gay? Gay. Gay gay gay gay gay. Gay. Gay? Gay Gay! Gay is gay from just being gay. Gay. Being gay? Gay. Being afraid people will think you are gay because you enjoy something gay. Gay.

Submitted by Pete on February 8, 2007 - 9:22am.

I guess I'm gay as the Navy Choir.

What Danny said
Submitted by Christy (not verified) on February 8, 2007 - 9:01am.

What Danny said here is brilliant, I love it! I humbly bow at his feet....

(I had the Girbaud's too! Did you buy yours at Copper Rivet too?)

Submitted by Pete on February 8, 2007 - 9:24am.

The Riv was for rich kids. If I remember right, I got mine at the DI.

Gay or European?
Submitted by Sofi (not verified) on February 8, 2007 - 1:34pm.

When I see men with eyeliner and frosted locks, I always think, "He's not gay. He's just European." More often than not, they're also wearing royal blue or canary yellow jeans. Where I live, this look is alive and well, thanks to the European tourists.

I totally remember seeing the "new wave" boys getting jumped in the hallways of Brighton High School just because they were wearing eyeliner. The jumpers were always cowboys, jocks or a bad combination of both.

The Copper River comment was great. What a blast from the past. I bought my Girbaud's from JMR. Is it still around?

Submitted by Pete on February 8, 2007 - 2:00pm.

I think JMR is still around. See comment above for why I wouldn't know.

new wavers
Submitted by Sideon on February 8, 2007 - 4:09pm.

A straight guy who just happened to introduce me to Frankie Goes to Hollywood, Depeche Mode, Frazier Chorus, etc... had a habit of wearing combat boots and a plaid kilt. He had jet black hair that he sometimes spiked like Billy Idol. The requisite eyeliner was there too. He was jumped by the jocks and cowboys almost daily, but it should be noted that they'd only do it as a group because any one of them he could take by himself. The guy had incredible arms.

He transferred from Brighton to Skyline, and then I don't know where the hell he went. I hope he owns half of Utah by now and is charging those Brighton fuckers some incredibly lucrative rent.

A good haircut changes
Submitted by wry catcher (not verified) on February 10, 2007 - 10:36am.

A good haircut changes everything.

Submitted by Pete on February 10, 2007 - 6:02pm.

Yeah, a good close trim is always nice.

hair cuts rule!
Submitted by ripzip (not verified) on February 12, 2007 - 8:22am.

Ahhhh. A good haircut makes the world right.

Your teenage self sounds like the kind of guy I would have dated in high school...had there been guys like that in our podunk redneck school.

Submitted by Pete on February 12, 2007 - 10:19am.

Maybe but probably not. Nobody dated me in high school.

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