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Height/Weight Spandex Index

Ladies, for your convenience, I have put together this handy chart. The index is useful whether deciding what to wear to aerobics or for a weekend bike ride. Conceivably it could be applied to other fashions as well (ie, bikinis, miniskirts, knit leggings, etc) but has been specifically tuned for spandex use.

Religion never gave me anything this useful.
Religion never gave me anything this useful.

Filed under -


But then ...
Submitted by Sara Sue on March 5, 2007 - 4:52pm.

What would we have to laugh about at the gym, mall, walmart, etc.?

I think your chart needs modifications.... :)
Submitted by Caryn (not verified) on March 5, 2007 - 5:23pm.

I think spandex is just scary, regardless of who is wearing it. My husband is 6'1" and wears the spandex pants for running. I think he looks stupid, even though he has a hot body. I guess the need to shave precious seconds off his running time out weighs the looking stupid factor. ;)

Submitted by Pete on March 5, 2007 - 5:27pm.

There is no men's version of this chart because it is NEVER safe for guys to smuggle plums. Never.

Submitted by Caryn (not verified) on March 5, 2007 - 10:22pm.

And why is it alright for women to walk around with camel toe? Ewwww!
Please don't tell me you like it...

Plums...?
Submitted by Liz (not verified) on March 5, 2007 - 5:48pm.

...those are plums in there? Are you sure, because I was under the impression yams are kept there? That's why "they" are referred to as "Yam Sacks".

Thank god
Submitted by Loralee (not verified) on March 5, 2007 - 10:09pm.

It's nice to know that I fall into the "Spandex Safe Zone."

Now when I feel the need to bitchslap a Solid Gold Dancer and confiscate her wardrobe I will have justification.

Whew...
Submitted by Tiggerlane (not verified) on March 6, 2007 - 9:09pm.

Well, I'm in the green zone. It was a lot harder on us short chicks!

Then again, should there be another chart, that factors in AGE?
Somehow, I think my age,(regardless of my beauty), might eliminate spandex from my wardrobe - by default.

i'm in da zone
Submitted by jess (not verified) on March 8, 2007 - 12:09am.

yay for me. but i think your chart is, er, rather generous.

it is possible that i am way too self conscious or judgmental. i won't deny it.

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