My First Felony

I committed my first felony today. Well... the first one I'm going to tell the entire planet about. It felt great and I'm not sorry about it at all.

I packed a single 12oz bottle of This Old Man's Amber Ale in a box with styrofoam and shipped it UPS to a friend in Virginia.

Yes, my faithful Fiddleyonians (or as I've begun to call you lately, lunatics), importing or exporting any alcoholic beverage over Utah state lines is a crime. There is no license for exporting beer from Utah even available in the Beehive State. Even if there were, it's likely that no individual would have access to one.

But I had beer and my friend had none. I felt compelled, nay, obligated to share.

To think. I could technically lose my voting rights over this. I'm a dangerous, dangerous man. That's how I roll.

Filed under - Beer

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You are a good friend

Submitted by Christy (not verified) on March 6, 2007 - 5:18pm.

I wish I had a good friend that would send ME beer.

Agreed.

Submitted by Pete on March 7, 2007 - 12:32pm.

Me too.

Next thing you know ...

Submitted by Sara Sue on March 6, 2007 - 6:45pm.

you'll be opening a brothel for sexually frustrated exmos!

Umm...

Submitted by Pete on March 7, 2007 - 9:54am.

What?

Felonies

Submitted by clint on March 6, 2007 - 7:42pm.

Did you burn a flag while you did it? That's the only way you are going to catch the attention of folks like Arn (Orrin) Htch*.

*Vowell left out on purpose since in Utonics, vowels are an option.

--------------------------
http://www.signifyingnothing.com/clint

The Rocket's Red Glare...

Submitted by Pete on March 7, 2007 - 9:55am.

Yes. And a pair of garments. I also crossed the double-white line into the carpool lane.

Double Dog Dare Ya...

Submitted by Tiggerlane (not verified) on March 6, 2007 - 9:11pm.

It's also illegal to ship alcohol TO Arkansas.

I think if you really wanna call yourself a felon, you'd send ME a bottle!

Small-time crime doesn't pay!

Arkansas, Arkansas, I Just Love Ol' Arkansas...

Submitted by Pete on March 7, 2007 - 12:33pm.

If I had a nickel for all the things I've done that are a felony in Arkansas...

OOPS

Submitted by Loralee (not verified) on March 7, 2007 - 1:18am.

So the two six packs of Polygamy Porter I sent to my blogging friends in Minnesota made me a felon?

SWEET!

Yes...

Submitted by Pete on March 7, 2007 - 9:55am.

Yes, and them too. It also makes all of you sinners.

In the Name of Love, One Beer in the Name of Love

Submitted by danny on March 7, 2007 - 2:09am.

Whomever this lucky southerner is to whom said beverage was awayed, one should naturally consume the evidence upon its arrival...at an agreeable sudsy beverage drinking temperature.

A One That Is Not Cold...

Submitted by Pete on March 7, 2007 - 9:56am.

is hardly a one at all.

Now to MY first Felony

Submitted by danny on March 7, 2007 - 2:14am.

It was a warm summer day...and I had just received a phone call...a familiar voice...Hey is this my journal or that Godforsaken Blog!?

ooh sorry....

So anyway, I opened the the door and put on a CD...and a raincoat....

Careful...

Submitted by Pete on March 7, 2007 - 10:01am.

The next thing you know, the Bangor Gang Unit will be knocking your door down.

I have beer to swap. some

Submitted by buckhntr (not verified) on March 7, 2007 - 9:13am.

I have beer to swap. some Vienna Lager is ready to bottle. But alas I have no cool label as I am graphicly challenged. Hoist one for me.
I hope the revenuers don't catch up to you too soon. Dear, could you get me Elliot Ness's number?

Tell me more...

Submitted by Pete on March 7, 2007 - 10:02am.

I am afraid to lager. Tell me what I need to look out for.

Tears

Submitted by Steve-O (not verified) on March 7, 2007 - 5:19pm.

Baby Jesus weeps for you.

Jesus H...

Submitted by Pete on March 7, 2007 - 5:23pm.

He doesn't care about me. He's too busy backseat driving to notice.