Making Up

I could hear sniffling from the hallway outside our bedroom door as Donna and I argued. I opened the door and the light poured in revealing the silhouette of our ten year-old daughter, Cindy. She was crying and clutching her teddybear, Stanley.

Cindy came in and her mother cradled her on the bed.

"What's the matter?" I asked, knowing full-well what the matter was.

"I hate it when you guys argue."

"Oh, baby. Mommy and Daddy are just having a disagreement. We'll work it out and everything will be just fine."

"But you're arguing", she sobbed.

"Do you sometimes argue with us?"

"Yes."

"And do you still love us?"

"Yes."

"It's the same with us. Sometimes we disagree but we always make up. I'm so sorry we woke you up."

Cindy lingered in our room for a few more minutes. Once she calmed down a little her eyes wouldn't stay open. I carried her back to her room and kissed her goodnight.

Cindy's visit cooled us down quite a bit. We still had a few things to say to each other but it was a sharp reminder about why she and I have worked so hard to make our marriage work. We finished our discussion more calmly.

Then Donna and I made up... twice.

Filed under - Donna | Family | Marriage | Sex

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Twice!

Submitted by Sara Sue on April 11, 2007 - 10:39pm.

Atta boy ... and girl!

PPK

Submitted by Liz (not verified) on April 12, 2007 - 11:44am.

Ahh...the Positive Power of Kids! Nothing like a little reality check to whip us back into shape. It's interesting to me when an argument gets interrupted (by just about anyone), how far from the real issue/s we seem to be.
In regards to the making up..... Right On "Brother & Sister Pete". When my twin sons were about 20 or 21 they came to stay with me for a couple of months. The house rule was "If mama ain't gettin any, ain't nobody gettin any!" Well, I'm once again "not gettin any" so I'll just pretend that second round of making up was for me. Thanks, I needed that.

Dude......

Submitted by Anonymous (not verified) on April 14, 2007 - 1:23pm.

I'm sorry to offend, but I have to tell you what I think.

You are so disrespectful. You want intimacy from Donna? Yet you go behind her back to blog about her for the whole world to read about her sexual issues? Poor woman. You are expecting a hell of a lot out of her. Give her a break. She wears the g's because that's probably all she knows. She takes them off and TRIES to get sexy with you in bed, but you just blast her for not being "authentic" enough? What have YOU done for HER lately? How about this: Encourage her come to bed with the garments ON, (because that's obviously what makes her comfortable) but tell her how BEAUTIFUL she is anyway. Look into her eyes. Tell her you love her. Touch her. Adore her. Appreciate her. Lavish her with praise and affection. You want authentic intimacy? Try being authentic yourself.

I really feel for your wife because it sound like she's trying desperately to do the right thing both in her religion AND with her husband. Yet she's screwed on both ends. She can't win either way. She can't be "good" enough as a Mormon (no one can.....been there, done that myself) and she can't be "good" enough for you either apparently.

It's always...

Submitted by Pete on April 15, 2007 - 10:06am.

It's always the anonymous ones, isn't it?

You said it all with "...trying desperately to do the right thing both in her religion AND with her husband..."

That's precisely my problem with the influence of her religion in my marriage. I suspect that if you felt your spouse's affection was being shared between you and some other competing entity that you would, at some point, insist on a show of full commitment.

You asked the question, " What have YOU done for HER lately?" Well... besides years of therapy, 10 years of participation in a cult at her behest, providing an honest and generous living, allowing her the freedom, encouragement and opportunity to do whatever she wants with her life and being hella good-looking... not that much.

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